It Won't Do
by Aurum
Summary: Karofsky can sing but can't angst in peace, Rachel gets a pet project and a minion of sorts, and Kurt tries to make sense of it all with mixed results.  Contains blackmail, music, magical power of friendship and trace amounts of nuts.


**Prologue**

_In which Dave is a little desperate and Rachel doesn't snoop – she's just in the right place at the right time._

* * *

><p>Apparently, forgetting about Kurt Hummel was damn near impossible.<p>

When Hummel changed schools, Dave thought his life would be much easier. He wouldn't have to look at the eyesore every day, he could concentrate on the team and his studies, get some better grades so his father would lay off him. He'd finally have some peace. Out of sight, out of mind, right?

Wrong.

It was even worse. Even though he knew Fancy wouldn't be there, he couldn't help but think that he'd see him around every corner. He would stroll confidently through the hall, ready to suddenly appear (like a ninja) behind somebody and loom menacingly, but then his preferred target wouldn't be there and he'd deflate (more like a balloon poked by a ninja, maybe). But he totally wasn't disappointed when that happened, alright? He deflated with _relief_.

Also, he got the strangest urge to follow every person wearing a scarf.

He did a double take when he saw somebody using Hummel's locker, not two weeks after he went back to school after his suspension. It turned out that some kid moved there, because he thought the location was better or something. (He ran back crying to his old locker after the third body check into this one. What a wuss.)

He could've tolerated all that, if only thoughts about Ladyface plagued him just at school. But no, that would be too easy. He was shoveling snow off the driveway when he suddenly thought that Kurt's gloves were probably fur-lined or something, to keep his little hands fashionable as well as warm. He nearly cut off his foot with the shovel in surprise.

Something had to be done.

Pushing people into walls just didn't hold the same appeal anymore, and slushying losers seemed like a waste of money. (Okay, well, it still was a _fun_ waste of money. He just chose different losers than before.)

He tried watching porn (that is, even more porn than usual), but that backfired rather spectacularly. What the hell was wrong with the porn industry? Suddenly they seemed to hire only uninteresting women and Hummel's look-alikes. Despite the fact that some parts were disturbingly interesting, it all just looked wrong, and wasn't that a sad commentary on the state of Dave's mind?

He thought about talking a cheerleader (Katie, or Cathy?) into giving him 'a hand'. In fact, she had pretty nice hands, didn't paint her nails and kept them rather short, which was a plus for some reason. Well, she was pretty in general, but when he tried to imagine it, he just saw hands on his body (and he would swear on his life that they belonged to Katie and not to anybody else). In the end he rejected the idea as too risky. He wasn't very verbal during sex (as far as he knew), but it still might've turned into a catastrophe.

Basically, he tried everything, but Kurt fucking Hummel stubbornly clung to some weird yet insistent part of his mind. (Well, not _fucking_ as in fucking Hummel. Just the fairy himself. Right.)

Actually, there was one thing he hadn't tried yet, but it was more like something Fancy would do. On the other hand, maybe it'd turn out to be just the thing to finally make him forget about the boy. Fight him with his own weapon or something.

He might as well try it. It wouldn't hurt. (Probably.)

ooooo

Normally Rachel wouldn't be seen at school this late in the afternoon (it was time for her private practice at home), but she forgot her sheet music in the rehearsal room and _"Of course I need it today. It absolutely can't wait. You won't make me go back there all by myself, right Finn? Thank you, darling."_

But Finn was waiting outside (he said something about looking at the halls for too long in one day) and Rachel was forced to brave the weirdly silent school alone. She was just about to enter the choir room when she noticed something unexpected.

Dave Karofsky was standing near the piano, looking somewhat lost. Maybe he was trying to pull off some kind of a prank? But it looked like he was alone and just fiddling with something in his hands. Could he be planting a bomb?

Obviously, it was her duty to the glee club to investigate. She cautiously pushed the door open and stuck her head into the room.

Soft music was playing from somewhere. So, it was probably an MP3 player and not a bomb. Well, that was a relief. But what was he doing, playing music in their rehearsal room?

Karofsky skipped a few songs and finally seemed to settle on one. He took a deep breath and faced the empty chairs, where the glee club sat during meetings. Rachel didn't hear it at first, because he started so quietly, but he was actually _singing along_ with the song.

_It won't do  
>to dream of caramel,<br>to think of cinnamon  
>and long for you.<em>

_It won't do_  
><em>to stir a deep desire,<em>  
><em>to fan a hidden fire<em>  
><em>that can never burn true.<em>

His voice was gradually getting stronger and Rachel was forced to acknowledge that he wasn't half bad. Nowhere near as good as her, naturally, but that was just the curse of being a true star – nobody could quite compare.  
><em><br>But I don't know  
>how I would live with myself,<br>what I'd forgive of myself  
>if you don't go.<em>

_So goodbye,_  
><em>sweet appetite,<em>  
><em>no single bite<em>  
><em>could satisfy...<em>

Karofsky was really getting into the song. She could tell there was some real emotion and... Rachel muffled her gasp with a gloved hand. Was he singing _to somebody_? It kind of sounded like that. Oooh, that was interesting!  
><em><br>But I don't know  
>what I would give of myself,<br>how I would live with myself  
>if you don't go.<em>

It was definitely suspicious. Why would he sing a song like that? And right there? Well, it _was_a music room... But still! It just had to be something positively scandalous. (And she was the first to know, for once!)

_It won't do  
>to dream of caramel,<br>to think of cinnamon  
>and long<br>for you..._

He trailed off with the song and stood there for a while, unmoving. Rachel was still debating with herself whether she should go talk to him or flee the scene, when the boy sighed heavily.

"Well, that was freaking useless," he grumbled and stopped the song that started playing next.

Rachel chose retreat. She hid around the corner until Karofsky left, and then went in to get her sheet music. (She wouldn't forget about it for a second time, no matter what exciting things happened.)

She took out her phone and scrolled through the contact list to 'Kurt', but hesitated before pressing 'call'. He probably wouldn't want to be reminded of his tormentor, even to discuss the possibility that the bully in question was in fact tormented by some secret, forbidden love. And was also a decent singer.

Well, she had to tell _somebody_! She scrolled back up to '~~FINN~~3', but then she remembered that her boyfriend (he may've thought he wasn't her boyfriend at the time, but she knew better) was waiting for her outside the school and rushed to him.

He actually met her halfway to the entrance, looking worried. "Are you alright? I saw Karofsky near the exit. He didn't do anything to you, did he?"

Rachel beamed at Finn, touched by his concern. "Oh no, everything's fine! Nothing happened. At least, nothing bad!"

She bounced in place, clapped her hands and began:

"Did you know that Karofsky can _sing_?"

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><p><strong>This is a much longer, finished story (though it's the first one of a series), but ffnet hates my formatting. Check out the rest of the story (plus amazing art and other fun things)<strong> here<strong>: **http : / / archiveofourown . org / works / 272013**** (remove spaces)****

**Sorry for the inconvenience, but I hope you'll enjoy it!**


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